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Here we go again cause Saturday is a hashing day! Joined by YTBN Amy, I walked into the Elk Creek Inn to find the hares, Dima and Chocolate Starfish seated at a booth with Miss Libertitties swilling beer. In the next booth sneaking a quick lunch were Crazy Pong Bitch and YTBN Becky. The Elk Creek Inn seemed to be a great place for a hash and DIMA had been scouting the place for a while. The hares assured us that the day’s trail would be short, flat and shiggy free. DIMA even tried to add creditability to the ploy by showing off his dry shoes and pants, like any of us were going to fall for that one…
In short order Corry’s favorite son; Tender Vittles strolled in wearing bright red shorts, brave hasher indeed! In fact red seemed to be the color of the day as many sported red shirts and at least one red thong. Perhaps we weren’t yet ready to let go of the fond memories of the recent Red Dress. Soon A.Y.T.? and Premature Spillage rounded out the Corry contingency by grabbing a bar stool and a beer. The pack was completed by the arrival of Pinch A Loaf and Soggy Box. The hares delayed chalk talk while we awaited the promised arrival of Sir Licks A Lot and our beloved HO. Also reported to be enroute were Tampon of the Opera and Fuck Face. But after a couple more pictures of beer the hares would wait no longer and out to the parking lot we went. TV went to his hash mobile and retrieved his chick magnet and honorary hash mascot, little YTBN Maggie May (is anyone keeping track of how many hashes she’s completed?) Chalk Talk was short and direct and the pack was off. Across a field we went in search of marks while a couple of horses galloped along the fence line besides us. We quickly came upon the first check place on top of a small hill. Soggy ferreted this one out and the pack was off again. A.Y.T.? was taking his good old time and romping with some bunnies at the back of the pack. Now r*nning along the road we noticed that the cost of flour must have risen cause the freaking hares were pretty sparse with its use. In short order three things happened. 1) We ran out of flour marks. 2) It started to sprinkle. 3) Sir and HO drove by and HO joined the pack while Sir went to the bar to take a shit, as usual.
Pinch r*n down the road about a ½ mile without finding any marks. Returning to the last mark the pack milled around trying to decide where the hell trail went. I r*n down an adjacent road and found flour. We were on again. Pushing up hill the pack strung out behind me. Soon I came across another check. One leg continued up hill while one led suspiciously down a muddy path. Too bad the hares had opted to wear red shirts cause I could clearly see them through the thin underbrush about 75 yards down hill. I FRB’ed down to the first beer check to find the hares parked by a small crack house complete with a junkyard behind. Sweet! Pinch and TV joined me followed by Soggy and YTBN Becky. As FBI’s the girls were encouraged to show off the girls, which Soggy eagerly complied with. Soon we spied Tampon and FF walking to the beer check holding hands, how sweet indeed. While the pack ate Troyer Chips and Tootsie Rolls and drank a brew, Sir made his appearance. Unfortunetly Sir was in the process of making his own road while driving the HO van across some farmer’s field! While the hares went up to prevent Sir from burying the HO van to the axles, the pack slipped out the back and on to trail. We continued downhill through some shiggy. Wildflowers were sprouting up everywhere. Purple Looseleaf and Trilliums were popping up all around. Ah yes it was going to be a good day. It had even stopped raining and the sun was trying to peek out.
It wasn’t long before we could hear the rush of water from Elk Creek. It was now apparent that we were going to get very wet. TV led the charge across the creek in search for flour. The trail meandered along and across the creek for well over ¾ of a mile. The streambed was slick and hashers linked arms for stability. The sun had burned through completely and the cool water was only mid-thigh deep on me, knee deep for Pinch. In any case the water crossings were refreshing and the scenery impressive as I followed YTBN Amy, Miss Tits, Crazy Pong Bitch and YTBN Becky downstream. Oh yeah there were fisherman, waterfalls, flowers and other shit to look at if you weren’t interested in looking at four cute harrierettes ahead of you…Needless to say, the beauty of the natural surrounding was lost on me that day. Meanwhile TV was flying downstream well ahead of the rest of the pack with Maggie May tucked under his arm. In due order we came along side the Elk Creek Inn. Pinch, YTBN Amy and Soggy were across the creek from the bar and found flour. Once again, the hares were tight with the flour. Miss Tits, AYT?, Premie, Crazy Pong Bitch, YTBN Becky and I were on the same side as the bar. Feeling the comforts of home, Miss Tits and AYT? joined the auto hashers already at the bar. Meanwhile Preemie, Pong Bitch, Becky and I tried to shortcut the trail and out guess the hares. Our attempt took us around the local pooper treatment plant [yummy] and through some heavy shiggy. Ultimately we found ourselves high above Elk Creek and across from the hares and the next beer check. Once again it was down the bank and across the creek where we joined the pack for a brew. Meanwhile, Soggy, Pinch, Preemie and YTBN Amy were going through some treacherous shaggy in search of trail. Pinchy found a sweet two-wheeled ride in a heap of scrap and proceeded to show off his BMX skillz. Trail disappeared as they took a wrong path to a gravel pile that Pinchy proceeded to climb and a few moments were taken to play. Finally, they got serious and found trail again until they came to a steep cliff where they spotted the BEER across the way. So close, yet so far, there was about a 25 foot drop between them and the goal. Preemie had managed to stumble in the water and was doing a one-man wet t-shirt contest all the while whining about his soggy smokes. TV was showing some heavy shiggy shags on his bare legs, as was YTBN Becky. YTBN Amy had a gash on the palm of her hand, which was discussed as naming fodder. All in all we were a happy bunch of hashers and it was good to be outside in the sun.
In short order Corry’s favorite son; Tender Vittles strolled in wearing bright red shorts, brave hasher indeed! In fact red seemed to be the color of the day as many sported red shirts and at least one red thong. Perhaps we weren’t yet ready to let go of the fond memories of the recent Red Dress. Soon A.Y.T.? and Premature Spillage rounded out the Corry contingency by grabbing a bar stool and a beer. The pack was completed by the arrival of Pinch A Loaf and Soggy Box. The hares delayed chalk talk while we awaited the promised arrival of Sir Licks A Lot and our beloved HO. Also reported to be enroute were Tampon of the Opera and Fuck Face. But after a couple more pictures of beer the hares would wait no longer and out to the parking lot we went. TV went to his hash mobile and retrieved his chick magnet and honorary hash mascot, little YTBN Maggie May (is anyone keeping track of how many hashes she’s completed?) Chalk Talk was short and direct and the pack was off. Across a field we went in search of marks while a couple of horses galloped along the fence line besides us. We quickly came upon the first check place on top of a small hill. Soggy ferreted this one out and the pack was off again. A.Y.T.? was taking his good old time and romping with some bunnies at the back of the pack. Now r*nning along the road we noticed that the cost of flour must have risen cause the freaking hares were pretty sparse with its use. In short order three things happened. 1) We ran out of flour marks. 2) It started to sprinkle. 3) Sir and HO drove by and HO joined the pack while Sir went to the bar to take a shit, as usual.
Pinch r*n down the road about a ½ mile without finding any marks. Returning to the last mark the pack milled around trying to decide where the hell trail went. I r*n down an adjacent road and found flour. We were on again. Pushing up hill the pack strung out behind me. Soon I came across another check. One leg continued up hill while one led suspiciously down a muddy path. Too bad the hares had opted to wear red shirts cause I could clearly see them through the thin underbrush about 75 yards down hill. I FRB’ed down to the first beer check to find the hares parked by a small crack house complete with a junkyard behind. Sweet! Pinch and TV joined me followed by Soggy and YTBN Becky. As FBI’s the girls were encouraged to show off the girls, which Soggy eagerly complied with. Soon we spied Tampon and FF walking to the beer check holding hands, how sweet indeed. While the pack ate Troyer Chips and Tootsie Rolls and drank a brew, Sir made his appearance. Unfortunetly Sir was in the process of making his own road while driving the HO van across some farmer’s field! While the hares went up to prevent Sir from burying the HO van to the axles, the pack slipped out the back and on to trail. We continued downhill through some shiggy. Wildflowers were sprouting up everywhere. Purple Looseleaf and Trilliums were popping up all around. Ah yes it was going to be a good day. It had even stopped raining and the sun was trying to peek out.
It wasn’t long before we could hear the rush of water from Elk Creek. It was now apparent that we were going to get very wet. TV led the charge across the creek in search for flour. The trail meandered along and across the creek for well over ¾ of a mile. The streambed was slick and hashers linked arms for stability. The sun had burned through completely and the cool water was only mid-thigh deep on me, knee deep for Pinch. In any case the water crossings were refreshing and the scenery impressive as I followed YTBN Amy, Miss Tits, Crazy Pong Bitch and YTBN Becky downstream. Oh yeah there were fisherman, waterfalls, flowers and other shit to look at if you weren’t interested in looking at four cute harrierettes ahead of you…Needless to say, the beauty of the natural surrounding was lost on me that day. Meanwhile TV was flying downstream well ahead of the rest of the pack with Maggie May tucked under his arm. In due order we came along side the Elk Creek Inn. Pinch, YTBN Amy and Soggy were across the creek from the bar and found flour. Once again, the hares were tight with the flour. Miss Tits, AYT?, Premie, Crazy Pong Bitch, YTBN Becky and I were on the same side as the bar. Feeling the comforts of home, Miss Tits and AYT? joined the auto hashers already at the bar. Meanwhile Preemie, Pong Bitch, Becky and I tried to shortcut the trail and out guess the hares. Our attempt took us around the local pooper treatment plant [yummy] and through some heavy shiggy. Ultimately we found ourselves high above Elk Creek and across from the hares and the next beer check. Once again it was down the bank and across the creek where we joined the pack for a brew. Meanwhile, Soggy, Pinch, Preemie and YTBN Amy were going through some treacherous shaggy in search of trail. Pinchy found a sweet two-wheeled ride in a heap of scrap and proceeded to show off his BMX skillz. Trail disappeared as they took a wrong path to a gravel pile that Pinchy proceeded to climb and a few moments were taken to play. Finally, they got serious and found trail again until they came to a steep cliff where they spotted the BEER across the way. So close, yet so far, there was about a 25 foot drop between them and the goal. Preemie had managed to stumble in the water and was doing a one-man wet t-shirt contest all the while whining about his soggy smokes. TV was showing some heavy shiggy shags on his bare legs, as was YTBN Becky. YTBN Amy had a gash on the palm of her hand, which was discussed as naming fodder. All in all we were a happy bunch of hashers and it was good to be outside in the sun.
April 22,2006 - Hash # 436
After drinking them up we made a short trek uphill to the road where we found another check. Trying to save money for more beer, the flour was again very sparse. All the while the hares stood by watching the pack split up searching for true trail. TV charged up hill a while I used my intuition and headed ( who said head ?)back towards the bar. After 75 yards I found the smallest dollop of flour and we were off. It was a short romp back to the bar and the awaiting wankers who auto hashed or short trailed. After cleaning up bit the hares directed us upstairs to a spacious loft area for down downs. It was about this time that Shitface Shuttle and YTBN Jamie joined us. Pinch served as RA and there were a few accusations. The hares drank for laying such a shitty trail in such a shitty location. FRB’s were TV and I. There were backsliders and haberdashery violations as well as other things I can’t recall. However the hash was in the mood for a naming. Actually two namings! Our GM Chocolate asked me to escort the two cuties Becky and Amy to the bar whilst the hash debated their new names. Sitting at the bar downing shots for courage the girls thought out loud about the possibilities. It seems that Becky had a hunch that they would recall an earlier hash were some story about gangbanging was bandied about. She feared that “Gangbanger” might not be well received by her hubby. At one point Premie came down to the bar to ask Amy questions about her line of employment. Seems Amy is a physical chemist/engineer and was currently employed at Mercyhurst College teaching the college’s Canadian Hockey players how not to blow themselves up.
Presently we were summoned upstairs again. Pinch requested the girls join him in the circle. However TYBN Becky must of caught a chill in the bar. Wearing a very thin white shirt, she paused to put on a hooded sweatshirt to cover her very hard…. nipples! [There was much discussion about renaming her “TWEAK-UMS] Pinch would have none of this and YTBN Becky gave all the boys a visual treat. [And yes she does know when her nipples are hard]. Pinch then proceeded to tell a story about how on trail Becky was seen with flowers in her pants. So for all time forward and forever more YTBN Becky will be known as PANSY PUSSY. Next YTBN Amy was called into the circle. Pinch inquired as to what she did and where she worked. Amy replied that she had just returned from Baltimore. In Baltimore she had worked for a company called BD doing process engineering. She further offered that her work is used in the diagnosis of STD’s. Pinch then asked what her favorite soap opera was. With a little prodding from Pinch, she replied General Hospital [not really]. In any case YTBN Amy will know for now and forever more as GENITAL HOSPITAL. Ah yes it was a good day. With all the hash business completed the hash proceeded to feast on wings and pizza.
That’s the way it was. If you missed it well then you’re screwed. Get your ass to Albion-on for Sex O DeMayo and buy our newest named hashers a shot. BTW Pansy prefers Apple Puckers and Genital prefers Tequila!!!
I am Swings Both Ways.
Presently we were summoned upstairs again. Pinch requested the girls join him in the circle. However TYBN Becky must of caught a chill in the bar. Wearing a very thin white shirt, she paused to put on a hooded sweatshirt to cover her very hard…. nipples! [There was much discussion about renaming her “TWEAK-UMS] Pinch would have none of this and YTBN Becky gave all the boys a visual treat. [And yes she does know when her nipples are hard]. Pinch then proceeded to tell a story about how on trail Becky was seen with flowers in her pants. So for all time forward and forever more YTBN Becky will be known as PANSY PUSSY. Next YTBN Amy was called into the circle. Pinch inquired as to what she did and where she worked. Amy replied that she had just returned from Baltimore. In Baltimore she had worked for a company called BD doing process engineering. She further offered that her work is used in the diagnosis of STD’s. Pinch then asked what her favorite soap opera was. With a little prodding from Pinch, she replied General Hospital [not really]. In any case YTBN Amy will know for now and forever more as GENITAL HOSPITAL. Ah yes it was a good day. With all the hash business completed the hash proceeded to feast on wings and pizza.
That’s the way it was. If you missed it well then you’re screwed. Get your ass to Albion-on for Sex O DeMayo and buy our newest named hashers a shot. BTW Pansy prefers Apple Puckers and Genital prefers Tequila!!!
I am Swings Both Ways.